Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Be Careful What you Tell Missionaries

Be careful what you tell missionaries who come to your home. Apparently discretion isn't taught at the LDS training center. I was stressed out with a work thing and the spanish speaking LDS missionaries came to my door. Not sure why they were canvassing this neighborhood, 'cept maybe trying to gain some newbie tracting experience. They were quizzing me about my religious beliefs...questions for which I really didn't have time to give them a full answer. So, suffice it to say that they left with juicy tidbits of religious gossip from a ~heathen~ like me. What did they do? Well, they went next door and spread said gossip to my neighbor. Finding out that this happened leaves me with an uncomfortably icky taste in my mouth. What can ya do? Plenty, methinks. I have a plan for the next poor missionaries who come to my door and I don't have time to chat. When asking what religion I am, for instance, I will simply state, "Did you see the sheep in back? Well, yes, we raise them for ritual sacrifices. Come June 21st, I will be stripping naked, smearing the blood of one of the innocent lambs across my nubile (hehehehe) body while dancing around the flames of satan. Would you like to come in for a cup of coffee?"