Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Size

*Ahem*, I'm well into my triple digits in weight. So, why would something a mere fraction of my size provide such fear? Why would a spider (a really, really big one) drive me to think I couldn't go up the stairs? I thought, "How can I pass such a massive beast and survive?? Would he jump on my ankle as I try to pass?" He was in a tricky spot where I couldn't just step on him, so I had to pass and then find *something* with which I could squish him. I seriously stared at him for about 4 minutes with four bags of groceries in tow. "Move, dammit! But don't move so far that I can't find you after I pass," I thought. So, I put the groceries down and finally decide to dash (well, you know, move as fast as I can, which isn't really very fast) past him. "Please, please don't jump on me!" I made it, grabbed a bottle of Mr Clean and sprayed 'em. He was not happy, so I, of course, had to put him out of his misery by beating him senseless with a broom handle. I had won. David had finally beaten Goliath.

1 comments:

Carrie said...

For the love of god, woman! Get yourself a bug vac!

http://www.sonictechnology.com/bugbuster.htm